i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

I've got an awful lot to say about my week at INDY so I'm going to just start with a few comments, observations, half-truths and questions. I can't take in my whole week in one sitting so it may take me a few days to get my whole experience in.
Yes, I did wear a new hat. My sweetie threw my old one in the burn barrel and it melted some of the siding on the house! More "honey do" stuff.
The rumors around the pits are completely false about Jack and I being signed to do a major studio remake of "The Odd Couple". But if we were, Jack would be Felix.
I was not locked in the bathroom of the coach all week. I WAS however not allowed to touch his laptop and there were certain people that I WAS NOT allowed to talk to(more on that later).
Jacks hair is real! However, it is the only hair on his entire body! (don't ask, it wasn't pretty and my eyes still sting from soaking them with bleach)
Jack has a publicist and three proof readers come in every evening to make sure that his posts are perfect!
Jack does his own make-up.
Jack takes three showers a day AND changes his wardrobe at least twice that many times! That can be a bad thing in a motorhome. The grey water tank was full by Friday and because of that I have a near terminal case of stanka$$.
But enough about Jack.
I'll post some more later.
(the un-dead are among us)

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

sounds like somebody had a good time :)

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Billy sure wore some T-shirts that had interesting messages on them. LOL
It was great to see Billy at Indy, again!

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Billy all I can do is Lmfao can't wait for the next chapter.

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

You're home, already? You didn't stay for the flying circus? :)

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

A few things that I would like to see at Indy.
Bobby Warren is my hero! Always has been, always will be. When will the NHRA give this man(and his talented family) the recognition that he deserves!
I would like to see Gary Richard, Jeff Teuton and, if he is going to continue to dabble in Stock, Victor Cagnazzi wear dirty, bib-overalls, a plaid shirt and a Funks-Hybrid hat while wandering around the Sportsmen pits. I would add Jacks name to that list but I'm trying to be realistic here.
I would like to see Gary Summers stand on the roof of his car in the middle of the staging lanes and drop drawers in front of everybody else in Stock Eliminator!
I would like to see Charlie Bob, his Dad, his brother Patrick, Paul Wong and the Polacks sitting around a campfire dressed like cowboys, eating beans and doing a "Blazing Saddles" imitation. It just seems right.

On a little different subject,
I learned a lot of new words this week, rich folk don't drink out of glasses, they drink sparkly stuff out of things called "flutes" and they eat this stale bread that looks like it's got a cow turd on it called biscotti! No wonder they're all so thin!
They get parked all in the same place by these people called valets! I think that it's got something to do with Redmans shirt.

I know that if a Sportsmen Racer starved at Indy this year it could only be because he didn't have a mouth. Every night it seemed like someone was putting out a spread and I think that I can say that it was greatly appreciated by all of us.

Just one more thing for today, Mr. Bongiovanni, we've never met and I know that you seem to be a very good, hard working man but could you please stop filling out your tech card with Rockaway N.J. as where you're from? You may very well reside in Rockaway N.J. or your business may be there but you're not "from" Rockaway N.J. If you ARE "from" Rockaway then I apologize and will gladly invite you to take a walk with me through Mount Hope after dark. Oh and what's with the boat? It's a nice boat but there's no water at Indy!
(the infection that created the Zombies started in Mount Hope)

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Kenny,
Please make Billy the "roving reporter" next year at Indy.

His insight is unique and much appreciated!

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

yup that's some funny stuff right there.

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

The "Live From ........." reporting Team has found its Andy Rooney.

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Billy,

Enjoyed having you and Jack as neighbors for the week/ weekend. Need to tone-down the late night partying though :-)

The Corn Guys

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

roflmao!

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Billy,
Have you been drinking?

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Anybody get any pictures of Billy's shirts?

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

I would like to see Charlie Bob, his Dad, his brother Patrick, Paul Wong and the Polacks sitting around a campfire dressed like cowboys, eating beans and doing a "Blazing Saddles" imitation. It just seems right. LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Perfect Billy!

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Well, looks like I've found my "must see" thread for the next few days..."

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Billy ....You missed your calling.....all these years of busting knuckles and you could have been making a living as a stand up comedian instead....

P.S. You need to drive around Rockaway where it borders Boonton Township........Nothing like Mt.Hope.....

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Rich, we need Billy and Matt Schurman announcing a race !
Or at least at a Banquet microphone with a few drinks in them !.
Nice observations Billy ! and congratulations for surviving a week with Jack !

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

As everyone else has said we definitely need to add Billy to the "Live From" reporters. Hopefully Ken has it in the budget to fit him in and if not I'm sure Jack would take a small pay cut...lol.

Please help us if we got Matt & Billy on the mic at the same time. I remember one year at E-Town it was on & off rain and they were trying to fit the classes in when they could. We'll during some downtime they allowed Matt to come up and do commentary....I'm sure he wasn't allowed within 50 feet of the tower after that day.

Speaking of Matt & Billy I found a spy photo of them already working out their routine..

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Blazing saddles..lol...

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

If Matt and Billy were on the mic they would need a 30 second time delay and a censor...or "filter" as some might call it....

Especially for Matt !!!

and no alcohol for either of them...

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Now, down to some serious business. The Zombie Apocalypse is upon us! And they're not the slow, stumbling kind of "Night of the Living Dead" Zombies! They're the "World War Z" kind of Zombies and they are here to eat our brains(they've gotten Kenny already and they've tried to get Jack, I think he's been infected though)!
The Zombies have made stunningly quick work of surviving humanity........
The new cars have made stunningly quick work of the surviving old cars in both Stock and SS and I can see a point in time not too far down the road where the Indy field will be made up entirely of Zombies and Vampires and Werewolves......
new cars and oddballs and aardvarks.
But it wasn't to be this year!!! The newest Stocker in the final was 23 years old and a good old 72 Nova took the gold( i think that Mcginley might be infected and Plourd hangs out awfully near the Zombie camp... no stop it)!
SS saw two mutants going at it but at least the bodys(warm bodys uuuuggghh) were 15 and 25 years old(fresh brains..ooooo).
A strange thing happened in the staging lanes on Sunday, I was speaking to Kenny and, suddenly, he BIT me! The wound seems to be getting infected and I want a 350 COPO
and............................................... .................................................. .................................................. .................................................. .................................................. .................................................. .................................................. .................................................. .................................................. .................................................. .................................................. .................................................. ................

(Bobby Warren has an enzyme in his blood that keeps him immune to the Zombie infection)

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Billy, I'm really glad you took time to stop by and chat with me as I didn't get away from my pits that much all weekend (my fault). It's always fun talking to you.
Nitro

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Anyone who has not had the pleasure of talking to Billy Nees needs to add that to their bucket list!

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Billy you know what they say, the one who yells the loudest is the one infected. I think you didn't have enough rum this weekend. Which you know will keep you from being infected.

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Billy, after reading about your ride with Jack, I heard through the grapevine that NHRA may have a new class for you to try......

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

DON"T DO IT BILLY, you don't need any stinkin copo, of ffffford, nor mopar. You are destined and famous for small power plants. Just wait until Pontiac comes out with it's version of muscle car, that's right up your alley. Till then you might want to team up with Carey Bales on a small engine for Stock that can go under by about a month. Be the #1 qualifier everywhere. Tick off all the standard production cars and the new bogus rated cars at the same time. Be the person that you are!

This message approved by the Federal Game and Fish Commision. Yes, it is a game and something fishy is going on.

Ron Ortiz
U/SA you can tune a car but not tuna fish

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Hey Ron; The deal with the hat is during his Florida tours the last couple of years he would stay at my place between races and every morning after we had our coffee he would whistle and the hat magically appeared, got a little scary, and what I have heard when Sunny threw the hat in the burn barrel it jumped out in flames and ran to the shop. Its hiding somewhere in there, probably waiting for Halloween!!!!!:eek:

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Zombies ???

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

That Billy guy just ain't right is he? LOL

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

give billy a copo...

he will sell it
he will use the money to finish his u/sa 301
he will then be #1 qualifier
he will then be able to do what he likes to do best...
he will thumb his nose at the millionaires.

life is full of simple pleasures

captain jack
and damn good to see you sir !!!!!!!!!!!!

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

He really ain't right ............

First of all Billy you broke the biggest racing rule - "What happens in Indy stays in Indy " .

Second - forget that hat stuff- there are more important issues at hand .

Next - yes, I am Felix - thru and thru .

I really would have been better off locking you in the bathroom for the entire week

Stop talking about my hair - I have plenty --- you have none ......

My publicist makes good money and should be doing this for me.

The three proof readers went nuts trying to fix this deal for you - two quit on me because of it

As for my showers - one has to look good for his public

And yes - you stink ! ! !

And my love for biscotti - well there is no better treat in the morning than biscotti and tea

All the other stuff - you're right ...its fiction and half-truths

And forget that Zombie stuff - your brain have been fried as long as I've known you

As for you getting a COPO -none of us are worried -as you'll never give up that kind of cash -- but I did tell Sunny where to use the metal detector in your back yard - Yeah , I just had to

Well , we've covered my hair and all my bad habits but lets talk about my BFF -his name is George and he's also my mouthpiece ........You'll be hearing from him and he'll be wanting those tin cans Sunny is digging up .

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

To know Billy is to love him , the true racer.

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Hey Capt. Jack, that really is a bit harsh, Summers car is a top shelf piece and he probably could have been #1 at his old HP. I was happy to see it.
Jack, don't waste your time or money with George, you just admitted I'm not right, everybody that knows me knows I'm not right and I volunteered to spend a week in a motorhome with you, that right there screams insanity defense. Or I could just say the Zombies made me do it.

After taking a few days to process the entire Indy Experience, I've decided to keep my impressions of the manufacturers new car programs rather short and sweet. The FFFord guys "get it". They had the absolute best parking spots in the place, any spectators that came through the main gate and followed the asphalt to the stands or the Pro pits passed an entire line of new FFFord racecars. They're hardcore, a mix of young and more experienced racers and there seemed to be plenty of support. The Mopar guys were pitted in the circle and in a fairly high traffic area with the new cars mixed in with the HEMI challenge cars. A good mix of tradition and modern. The GM guys, in their defense, are new to this game and playing catch-up. They had 20 COPOs there but were all parked together behind the teardown barn beyond the finishline. Not a lot of spectator traffic down there. I would like to suggest that when the time comes to write the check for title rights to the 2014 Chevrolet Performance U.S. Nationals that they insist on a parking spot as close to the manufacturers midway or between the main gate and the grandstands. I would also like to suggest that they ask their racers to stick around even if they go out early simply to show a presense at their race.
It's all about appearances and presense and marketing and believe it or not, I get it!
AND thanks to liberal amounts if internally applied tequila(I guess rum works too?) my Zombie bite healed up. I got better! Who needs a COPO(although they are neat) when you can have an aardvark.

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

ROTFLMAO!!! I read this the other morning before going to work. Nearly spit coffee all over the table.

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Bill,I liked your presentation,except for one word.LIBERAL????????????????

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Hey Billy, how fast is that Aardvark??

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Hmmmm Aardvark, I kinda like that.... Aardvarks should be "O" and slower!

Aardvarks UNITE !!!!!!

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Naw, he's just been off his meds too long...he'll get better....maybe.

JimR

Re: i made it home a"LIVE from INDY US NATIONALS 2013"
 

Sign me up!